Rastall Ramblings: Embrace the Despairing Inevitability of the Kansas City Chiefs

The calendar is about to flip over to February, which can only mean one thing: the Kansas City Chiefs are preparing to play in the Super Bowl.

Last Sunday, a weary nation of football fans gathered in the hopes that this time would be different. Could superstar QB Josh Allen and the plucky Buffalo Bills finally vanquish Kansas City in the playoffs to get one step away from claiming the long-suffering franchise’s first Super Bowl title?

Surely it would have to happen eventually. The Chiefs had gone 11-0 in one-possession games during the regular season. No matter how amazing, clutch and well-coached a team is, you can only maintain that highwire act for so long. The Bills, despite coming into the year with some question marks on defense, got the best version of Josh Allen this season and once again knocked off Kansas City during the regular season. And at some point, the Bills’ regular season success against the Chiefs would have to translate over to the playoffs.

Wrong. Shame on anyone who expected anything different.

The Chiefs were never going to lose to the Bills Sunday at Arrowhead Stadium. Of course they weren’t. The result was etched in stone all along. Another Buffalo-Kansas City classic would come down to the final minutes and the Chiefs would squeak out a win.

When the Bills defense held Kansas City to a field goal for a 32-29 Chiefs lead with 3:33 left, the door was cracked open for Allen to orchestrate a legacy-altering touchdown drive to win the game and exorcise the Kansas City demon on behalf of himself, the entire Bills fanbase and the millions of NFL fans who were begging and pleading for anything other than another Chiefs Super Bowl.

Have some shame. A run-of-the-mill turnover on downs was, frankly, one of the more merciful ways for that drive to end. Sure, you could point out that Allen’s desperation heave on fourth down somehow nearly found Dalton Kincaid for an improbable first down, but let’s be realistic. There was a better chance of Kincaid’s hands spontaneously combusting than there was of him catching that pass.

I know many fans are tempted to view the Chiefs’ success as being aided by the refs as part of some sort of Roger Goodell-directed conspiracy or whatever. I think that’s too simplistic a view. There is something far more sinister afoot. Dark magic? Witchcraft of some kind? I don’t know exactly, but whatever it is, I’m a little scared of it and I don’t want to be caught rooting against it anymore.

I say welcome to the Patrick Mahomes-Andy Reid-Steve Spagnuolo triumvirate that rules over the NFL. Long may they reign. What’s that? Another one-score Kansas City win with increasingly worse State Farm commercials interspersed throughout it? Sign me up!

I know that during the break between conference championship Sunday and the Super Bowl, many will convince themselves that Saquon Barkley, the face of the NFL’s running back renaissance, and the Philadelphia Eagles have what it takes to dethrone this dynasty. I caution against it. Rooting for the Chiefs to lose is about as effective as rooting for the sun to just decide not to rise one day.

I say embrace the inevitability of the Kansas City Chiefs and the NFL’s first three-peat of the Super Bowl era. After all, Mahomes is only 29 and do you really expect this nonsense to stop anytime soon?